Renaissance Sistah's Journal

Song of the Moment - Aretha Franklin's - Ain't No Way..... this has become a daily listener in the mp3 jukebox rotation.... It's rubbing on me. Aretha's a sister that finds a way to rhymethically (spelling ???) voice pain and emotions with her songs.

I am continuing to have difficulty resting at night. Isomnia seems to be in existence. Sleep escapes me at this very moment. I am doing overtime in a different dept, where i am due in at 12am until 12 noon tonight\tomorrow, and I have only gotten about 3 hours of sleep... Somethings wrong, but I DONT, and WILL NOT take drugs to fix this.

I am beginning to repress a lot of childhood memories, and have begun to open my psycheto allow these memories to surface. I eventually want to talk and share this with friends and individuals in my life... but where do i begin, and how do I begin... perhaps continuing to taking it one day at a time.....hmmmmm!
posted by Renaissance Sistah on Saturday, February 10, 2001 The Literal World of Feminism.....

I had an oppurtunity to catch rebcca walker, daughter of alica walker (the color purple, etc.) on CSPAN2..the book tv channel read from her book, "Black, What, and Jewish.". This sister has a great sense of what life's experience offers not only being a minority, but a person of a mixed race, and also being jewish. Rebecca does a great job of providing feedback to not only her readers and listeners, but also to her parents - mom & dad...

She allows an oppurtunity to open up a channel of communication to discuss her pain of childhood from her point of view. This sistah has real intellectual power with words..... I am gonna grab the title when I get a chance. Be sure to check the link out. She has a feminist foundation know as Third Wave Foundation devoted to cultivating young women's leadership and activism.

Gotta Run... Be Back!
posted by Renaissance Sistah on Saturday, February 10, 2001 [speak ya mind] --------------------

Friday, February 09, 2001

With the help of this person here /usr/bin/girl:, I have made some progress on my site... I am really excited now... I no longer have such a dull layout.... With a little play time on the html codes, I will have this thing looking jazzy in no time.....! Let's do this. YEAH BABY!
posted by Renaissance Sistah on Friday, February 09, 2001 this is the test of new layout
posted by Renaissance Sistah on Friday, February 09, 2001 [speak ya mind] --------------------

Monday, February 05, 2001

The song of the moments appears to be Tamia's "There is a Stranger in My House"... Instead, there is a stranger in my thoughts, my mind.. (my inner voice ... i guess!) My thoughts have been scrambled all over the place, so I haven't had the nerve to stop here and write. I figure I would reveal a lot more than I'd ever hope to display at this time. I will take my time to explore those thoughts before actually putting them in words.

Well, He and I haven't spoken since the previous conversation displayed below... I figure we are both resisting the coldness that the other blows forward. I reallly miss HIM. But, my heart has gradually realized that it's over....., there is this empty feeling that's aching for some answers that I know I may never recieve. Yet this stranger (inner voice) in my mind is wanting me to believe something different.

I felt pretty good at the ending of my last week. I gave a appreciation speech for a scholarship I recieved which put me thru college. It felt good to once again recieve a standing ovation from a group of people who judge me on the content of my speech, and not necessarily on my appearance or strange influence..... I felt honestly comfortable, and provided a little humor. I need to work on my volume and speed though.... I tend to go pretty fast when I am nervous. But I made it through, and felt pretty darn GOOOD!

Work's interesting as ever..... I met a new co-worker, who's in the medical field. She has been bombarded with "office gossip", and somewhat hesitates to extend friendship to some around her. I think we have established a silent code of friendship, but can't figure out how it happen. She seems a bit confuse, yet skeptical, because I am considered the "GOD CHILD" of the two head bosses... it's also passed on that I gossip, and "tell on peeps".... Go FIGURE... I did have to explain the truth to those statements to her. She seem to have understood my stance, and provided no questions, although, her facial expression revealed something different.